Emotional Abuse

Emotional abuse is a form of communal violence that circles all forms of non-physical violence and distress caused through non-verbal and verbal acts. Emotional abuse is calculated and employ and is a method of control. 

It often occurs in partnership with other types of abuse, but it may also occur alone. Just like other kinds of abuse, emotional abuse most commonly affects those with the least power and resources.

Emotional abuse can happen to anyone at any time in their lives. Children, teens and adults all experience emotional abuse and emotional abuse can have destructive effects on relationships. Just because there is no physical harm doesn't mean the abuse isn't exist and isn't a problem or a crime.

Emotional abuse can be defined as:

 "Any act including confinement, isolation, verbal assault, humiliation, intimidation or any other treatment which may diminish the sense of identity, dignity, and self-worth."

People who go through any emotional abuse have very low self-esteem, show personality changes, such as becoming withdrawn and may become depressed, anxious or may have suicidal thoughts.

Emotional Abuse Signs and Symptoms

Emotional abuse symptoms vary from individual to individual. Signs of emotional abuse include:

• Yelling or swearing 
• Name calling or insults
• Threats 
• Ignoring or excluding
• Isolating
• Humiliating
• Denial of abuse
• Blaming of the victim

Emotional abuse tends to take the form of a cycle. In a relationship, this cycle starts when one partner emotionally abuses the other. The abuser then feels guilt, but not about what he or she does, but more over the results of his or her actions. 

The abuser then gives reasons for his own action to avoid taking responsibility over what he or she had done. The abuser then shows "normal" behavior as if the abuse never happened. In fact, he or she acts extra charming, apologetic and giving – making the abused party believes that the abuser is sorry. The abuser then begins to imagine about abusing his partner again and build up a situation in which more emotional abuse can take place.

Examples of Emotional Abuse

Following are the examples of Emotional Abuse;

•         Threats of violence or abandonment
• Intentionally frightening
• Making an individual fear that they will not receive the food or care they need
• Lying
• Failing to check allegations of abuse against them
• Making derogation or slanderous statements about an individual to others
• Socially isolating an individual, failing to let them have visitors
• Withholding important information
• Demeaning an individual because of the language they speak
• Intentionally misinterpreting traditional practices
• Repeatedly raising the issue of death
• Telling an individual that they are too much trouble
• Ignoring or excessively criticizing
• Being over-familiar and disrespectful
• Unreasonably ordering an individual around; treating an individual like a servant or child

Effects of Emotional Abuse

The effects of emotional abuse may be harder to point out because like physical abuse it does not have and marks but have both short term and long term effects.

Short-Term Effects

Short-term effects of emotional abuse include:

• Surprise and confusion
• Questioning of one's own memory, "did that really happen?"
• Anxiety or fear
• Shame or guilt
• Aggression
• Becoming overly passive or compliant
• Frequent crying
• Avoidance of eye contact
• Feeling powerless
• Feeling manipulated, used and controlled
• Feeling undesirable

Long-Term Effects

In long-term emotionally abuse, the victim has such low self-esteem that they often feel that they are not worthy of a non-abusive relationship. Adult emotional abuse leads to the victim believing the terrible things that the abuser says about him/her. Emotional abuse victims often think they are going crazy or going mad.

Effects of long-term emotional abuse include:

• Depression
• Withdrawal
• Low self-esteem and self-worth
• Emotional instability
• Sleep disturbances
• Physical pain without cause
• Suicidal idealization, thoughts or attempts
• Extreme dependence on the abuser
• Underachievement
• Inability to trust
• Feeling trapped and alone
• Substance abuse

Emotional Abuse Treatment and Therapy

Emotional abuse treatment and therapy is available to help either one or both parties in the abusive situation. Emotional abuse treatment might be sought after experiencing emotional abuse in a personal relationship or even at work.

In abusive situations, abusive behavioral and thought patterns tend to become deep-rooted over time and emotional abuse therapy can address this and work to create healthy, functional relationships in the future.

Emotional Abuse Treatment for the Abuser

Sometimes, the victim can bully the abuser into emotional abuse treatment either in a couple or individual therapy setting. This is rarely helpful and can harm the relationship. In couple's therapy, the abuser has the chance to misrepresent themselves and charm the therapist into believing there is nothing wrong with them and behave as if the victim has all the problems.

 Individual therapy for emotional abuse is even worse because the therapist doesn't even have the victim's take on the interaction. The therapist is likely to understand the feelings of the abuser because of which he abused the victim.

Even if the individual therapy is successful in dealing with the deep-seeded emotional problems of the abuser, this might make the abuser angry and give him or her another reason to emotionally abuse the victim.

Only if the emotional abuser understand that they have a problem with emotional abuse and are prepared to openly deal with it can emotional abuse therapy even have a chance to be successful.

Emotional Abuse Treatment for the Victim

Emotional abuse treatment for the victim has more chance of being successful but only if the victim is prepared to be as open and honest as possible about the abuse. 

Many emotional abuse victims hide the abuse, even from therapists, due to their own shame and guilt. An emotional abuse therapist though, can only help when they truly understand the problem.